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  1. #1
    Join Date
    Aug 2008
    Posts
    24

    Default How to KILL moles

    Does anybody have a sure fire way of KILLING moles short of a nuclear strike ?

    All my mole activity is piles of dirt, no place to set traps. Other people I talk to have surface tunnels. What causes them to behave differently at different locations?

    There has to be a solution out there. I can not believe these things are so superior to our technology......

    I've tried:
    Trap->2 kills
    Poison-> ? kill/s
    Shovel-> 1 kill
    Water hose -> 3 kills

    I'm ready to sell my house Please help!!!!!!!!

    albanello
    Last edited by albanello; 05-12-2011 at 08:46 AM. Reason: change Notification Type

  2. #2
    Join Date
    Dec 2010
    Location
    Houston Texas
    Posts
    2,509

    Default Re: How to KILL moles

    The moles eat insects, grubs, bugs and such. Kill off the insects the moles will move to greener pastures. There is no quick fix that doesn't require a special permit from the Pentagon.

  3. #3
    Join Date
    Aug 2007
    Posts
    6,617

    Default Re: How to KILL moles

    You need 4 things to effectively eradicate moles and gophers from your yard.

    1 - Shovel
    2 - Lawn Chair
    3 - Cooler full of favorite beer
    4 - Patience

    After that you just follow these simple steps to a vermin free yard.

    1 - Locate the freshest mound you can find and set up the lawn chair and cooler within shovel's reach of it.
    2 - Carefully expose the hole under the mound and then sit down in the chair.
    3 - Rest the shovel against the front of the chair so that it's easy to grab.
    4 - Crack open a brew.
    5 - Sit back, and wait for your unsuspecting victim to return and cover the opening of the hole.
    6 - When said unsuspecting victim returns, carefully set down your beer and pick up the shovel
    7 - WHACK the living c-rap out of said unsuspecting victim.
    8 - Stuff lifeless body of victim back into hole whence it came and cover it up with the dirt removed from the hole.
    9 - Sprinkle fresh grass seed over bare soil.
    10 - Move to fresh mound and repeat.


    Other helpful items in your pursuit of a mole free yard would be a sun shade for your chair, just don't shade the hole opening, and a side table to set your beer on between fatal beatings. If you can get the wife or girlfriend to bring you a sammich and keep your beer cooler full, that would be sweet!
    I suffer from CDO ... Its like OCD, but in alphabetical order, LIKE IT SHOULD BE!!!

  4. #4
    Join Date
    Jul 2010
    Location
    SoCal
    Posts
    5,443

    Default Re: How to KILL moles

    Spruce -
    Hahaha...I had the laugh of the week !
    Any idea how long it would take, on the average, to kill one (so I know how many six packs I need to bring)?
    Does this execution system work on gophers, ground squirrels, woodchucks or ex-wives too?

  5. #5
    Join Date
    Aug 2007
    Posts
    6,617

    Default Re: How to KILL moles

    Moles and gophers will usually come to a freshly opened hole within a few minutes, the key is that you open a fresh mound which indicates recent activity. Another trick to keep them from escaping is to slice a shovel into the ground to block their run, then you can use a second shovel or implement of death and destruction to brutalize the nasty little beast.

    As for chipmunks and squirrels, usually the best method is to stand out in the yard and act like a nut!

    If you have an infestation of ex-wives, it's time to cut your losses and move to a new house.
    I suffer from CDO ... Its like OCD, but in alphabetical order, LIKE IT SHOULD BE!!!

  6. #6
    Join Date
    Sep 2009
    Location
    florida
    Posts
    598

    Default Re: How to KILL moles

    Now thats funny Spruceeee....
    Gizmo

    Cut it 3 times & it's still to short.
    Inventor of the Miter Master Plus.

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  7. #7
    Join Date
    Jun 2011
    Posts
    1

    Default Re: How to KILL moles

    I had a pretty large mole problem the previous two summers. I first tried some mole repellent which you spray on the yard. It contained castor oil. It did nothing by make my yard smell weird. I then went to a mole conference at a local nursery, and left with the Victor out of sight mole trap. I ended up killing 6 moles last summer, and as of June 4 I have not seen any mole activity in my yard. The trap worked great, and my neighbors are now asking me to help them with their moles.

    Traps are the only way to go, but one that doesn't require digging into the tunnel such as those spear traps, are pretty worthless. Pinch traps work the best.

  8. #8
    Join Date
    Mar 2013
    Posts
    6

    Talking Re: How to KILL moles

    Hi everyone I'm knew to forum love the tv show just bought an older house built in early 60's this post had me laughing so hard I was in tears

    I don't think I have moles but hope the OP was able to conquer the mole army

    Thanks
    Last edited by radio geoff; 03-10-2013 at 02:21 PM.

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